I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
We got Pizza Hut & Papa Johns, delivered within seconds of each other, and both delivery people did a shot. I was put on Earth for this moment.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Randomize
