Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
They filled a kiddie pool with lube and glitter.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Randomize
