You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
You are so predictable. I am willing to bet 20$ that instead of going out you are sitting on your couch, stoned, watching Seinfield re-runs and eating cheezits.
1. they're goldfish. 2 fuck you
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Randomize