How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Just opened a beer with eyelash curlers... miss you.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
