Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
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