i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
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