The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Randomize
