I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She passed out in the backyard, making "face down" snow angels ... so they could have a smile.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
I'm auditing financial statements and ur growing weed this is bullshit how did this happen to me
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
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