do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
I realized courtney is my jiminy cricket but instead of preventing me from telling lies she prevents me from fucking strangers
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize