I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun new game when high: sorting socks. Took forever. Was awesome.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
These freshman guys were trying to holler at me from their window, and I realized about 20 minutes too late that the best possible reaction at that time would've been screaming "FLACCID PENIS". Oh, and I found this awesome zombie charm bracelet you would love.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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