Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
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He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
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Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
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