:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
He was rocking just a diaper, shoes, and a gun. Sadly, I would still hit it.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Randomize
