i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Randomize
