i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
One of the mothers are the party said to me "All your friends are getting married, you're just getting drunk"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Randomize