Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
Randomize
