so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
You've never even broken a bone. You singlehandedly disprove natural selection
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
You know it was a weird night when you find curly fries in your purse the next morning...
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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