I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
My mom just told me that the key to a successful marriage is never seeing your partner take a shit.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
A worker across the alley is wearing your sombrero sans cat barf.
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
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