So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
I love how kegs are figured into our monthly bills
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
million dollar idea: razor dispensers in bar bathrooms. your welcome, girls who didn't think they were getting laid tonight.
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
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