Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
You may now shotgun with the bride
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
So my plane's delayed and some guy is talking to "sparkles" he just told her to never again sell drinks from her cleavage. This is why I don't go home
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize