my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
So how many licks to the face does it take to get kicked out of the bar?
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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