So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
A homeless guy wouldnt accept my granola bar because he didnt have any teeth. I think i win the prize for the ultimate rejection
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
