I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
This girls ass literally just fell out of her jeans in front on me on the escalator. Going commando on a Monday morning is a bold move.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
