dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I was the last girl at the bar last night. It was like a battle royale between 10 guys.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Please come over here so I can show off my beard, talk to you about how quantum computing is actually a symptom of interstellar physics, and then put my head under your dress
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
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