Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
If that was your dad, he is hot
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
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