You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Just dunked an oreo in a white russian. Trying to think of a better experience in my life and failing.
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
took 4 advil with a shot of vodka, figure i'd try to save myself now
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
