So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
dude, I'm watching paul blart mall cop. I have better things to do than listen to you whine about your recent divorce.
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
So... Really random... You know we only exist cause Dad misspelled 'perseverance', right?
I had a dream about that dude. It was the first time I had a dream about him since the tryst.
The tryst?
The hookup. I like using sophisticated words for my foolish decisions. Makes me retain some dignity.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
