Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Human centipede...with the teletubbies. That's what my nightmare had in it.
I don't even want to know.
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
