Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize
