i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Wow, I just woke up in this conference with the woman beside me staring at me. This is what happens when hungover people sit in warm rooms...
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Do not let Mike show you his naughty Santa Claus outfit. It's a super long beard and crotchless pants.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
