fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Every time you blow me I should make a paper crane and we'll make them into a chain and hang them from the ceiling. And then whenever we have people over and they ask what the cranes are for I'll say "reminders" and wink at you.
She said she wants to move in with me. Time to black out and act as if we never had this conversation.
How are you a firefighter? People actually trust you with their lives??
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
