Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
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