That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
