we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
Randomize
