Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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