nut hugger
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
just answer this one ? for me. why is there human shit in my shower right now?
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
