She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
dream priorities were more important than voting today. don't tell me you wouldn't keep going back to sleep to find out who would win a fight between oprah and godzilla
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Honey, I don't care how "classic you" this is. It's not gonna matter if we can't find you in the morning.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
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