Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
I have vodka an food stamps. At some point today, that will undoubtedly turn into jello shots.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spending 4 hours in the emergency room today tells me that your birthday party was a success.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
I think I sold my soul to a dominatrix last night.
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