i can now get sex on a playground off my list of things to do in life.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
I just dropped $300 on lingerie. He better rip this off with his teeth.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
He was hammered and shot his pistol into the lawn. Next thing I know sheriffs are at our house with M4s. He likes to party
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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