I wannas sexs uuuuu
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
She suggested that I come visit her in Europe and hook up with the heteroflexible Korean who sits next to her in class. Polylove is the best love.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I'm trying to puke quietly so i don't ruin my grandma's birthday/my graduation brunch. And you say i need to grow up.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
