it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I've reached the gravitational age where it's very hard to get my face and my boobs in the same shot without some kind of yoga involved .
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
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