Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
I owe a guy a shoe because I threw it over a fence. That is all.
Why do I even exist?
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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