I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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