Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
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Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
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Driving from bar to bar trying to recover all of the possessions I've drunkenly lost over the course of the past few nights. Actual nadir of my life and absolute height of shamblyness.
Props for using the word nadir
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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