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ok, stay where you are, be there soon
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
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