I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
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