thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Is it bad that if I found out I couldn't have kids I'd be more pissed that I've been using unnecessary condoms than the fact that I'll never be a mother?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize