I think the only thing that impresses me are nice penises...and Jesus. Jesus would impress me. Especially if he walked on water again.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm willing to share. He can have sloppy seconds.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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