i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
I'm jealous of your bromance
it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
there is glitter all over my balls
Where are you guys?
Drunk
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
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