Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
