i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You don't understand she was in the fountain pretending she was diving for treasure. I couldn't possibly ruin her dreams.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
Tomorrow, you will get a text, and it will bE spelled right, that's me yo, certify ya soon
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
These tits shall not be calmed
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
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