A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
how does that bad decision feel?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
